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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24623488">As if sharing reflections of yourself</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/shichan/pseuds/mugiji'>mugiji (shichan)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Byhardt Week (Fire Emblem), M/M, first (clumsy) step to get in a relationship, sharing memories</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:48:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,963</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24623488</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/shichan/pseuds/mugiji</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“You could share secrets and memories! Even better if in your room and while eating snacks together!” Annette told him, full of enthusiasm “That’s something friends do.” and not that Byleth has better plans about this but he wonders if memories about fights and mercenary duties would be weird.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Linhardt von Hevring/My Unit | Byleth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>BYHARDT WEEK 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>As if sharing reflections of yourself</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Second entry for the byhardt week! Once I read the prompt "memories" I absolutely had to write something silly. I love Byleth trying to improve his communication (and social) skills so much, he's adorable.<br/>Hope you enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It’s been months since he came to Garreg Mach with Father and Byleth feels like this is enough time to not be strangers anymore, but not enough to be considered more than acquaintances. He has never been a teacher before all this, so naturally he thought about asking other teachers, which was harder than expected. The moment he went to Manuela for some sort of… counseling, she beamed at him and immediately began to explain how important it is to establish a deep relationship with the students (and </span>
  <em>
    <span>fellow teachers of course</span>
  </em>
  <span>). Byleth is quite sure most of the approaches she mentioned are not useful with students.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>So he went to Hanneman. The man is a wise one and reliable when it comes to Reason magic and crests but… Byleth lost the topic of conversation when Hanneman assured him that there is a special balance when it comes to being close to the students but not </span>
  <em>
    <span>too close</span>
  </em>
  <span> and he compared the situation to a very complicated theory Byleth doesn’t know anything about. He basically ran away.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Byleth avoided asking Shamir (because she’s a former mercenary, like him), Catherine (because she probably gets to know people by her fists first and Byleth can’t really beat his students up) and Alois (because well… he’s Alois). Seteth would have probably reprimanded him. And Father is out on a mission with the other Knights, so in the end Byleth was back to square one. That is when Annette and Mercedes approached him in the dining hall.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After five minutes straight of questions about how he was doing and small comments concerning how Byleth supposedly looked worried about something, he just surrendered. They are both good people, in his opinion, and it’s not like this is something shameful to talk about with students. So he simply asked “How are you supposed to close the distance between people?” which was quite clear if he can say it. Byleth didn’t expect the girls to be so enthusiastic; in fact, he doesn’t understand why they are so glad to hear his question.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think it is lovely that you want to have a mutual understanding with your students, Professor.” Mercedes speaks first, her delighted voice full of sweetness as always. Byleth doesn’t remember if he has ever heard her angry or annoyed. Maybe her patience is limitless. “I am sure that everyone else will be more than happy to know this.” “Absolutely!” Annette adds as she bends over the table, like looking at Byleth while being closer gives her more informations “But I never expected you to phrase it like this, Professor! It’s cute!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Byleth doubts he can be described as ‘cute’, but the two of them seem to agree and there is no real reason to deny it— also he supposes that it could end in a discussion none of them needs right now. In fact, after exchanging a look, Annette speaks. She’s a bit louder than Mercedes but it’s not bothersome and her cheerfulness helps Byleth a little so that he doesn’t feel too uncomfortable or at loss with that topic. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Luckily for you, Professor, Mercie and I know very well how to become friends!” she begins and despite the fact that Byleth probably can’t be </span>
  <em>
    <span>friends</span>
  </em>
  <span> with his students and that he just wanted to know how to close the distance between them (</span>
  <em>
    <span>some</span>
  </em>
  <span> of them, those he understands less) he doesn’t interrupt her and nods. Annette looks very confident, after that “We talked about magic, since we both liked it. Also, about make-up,” she keeps going until Mercedes taps at her shoulders and kindly suggest to give him some advice good enough for boys too “oh, and there’s that!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That?” Byleth asks, not the slightest idea about what </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> could be. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>*</span>
  <span></span>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>You could share secrets and memories! Even better if in your room and while eating snacks together!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Annette told him, full of enthusiasm “</span>
  <em>
    <span>That’s something friends do.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” and not that Byleth has better plans about this but he wonders if memories about fights and mercenary duties would be weird. In any case, here he is in front of Linhardt’s room with some sweet buns the cook gave him in exchange for taking a couple of cats out of the kitchen— not that Byleth would ever refuse cats. He likes them. So he will still go around the monastery to feed them later.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This with Linhardt is not something they agreed to do. But when Linhardt told him about wanting to study (or research?) him and his crest and that Byleth makes him curious enough to sleep less than usual, Byleth thought that it could mean something along the line of being close. Didn’t someone say, once (a mercenary? Manuela?) that you want to know about people you meet every day? Or was it about meeting often with people you want to know more about? Anyway, as confusing as it still is, Byleth wants to try. It’s been months, after all, and Linhardt </span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span> the student he spends time with the most. So he knocks.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Linhardt doesn’t reply at first and Byleth waits, but when he takes into consideration the chance of him being in the library or sleeping somewhere and he’s about to leave, the door opens enough for Linhardt to peek outside. When he recognizes Byleth he looks surprised, even more when the sweet buns are noticed. That’s when Linhardt opens the door completely: “I admit that this is a surprise. What brings you here, Professor?” and Byleth honestly doesn’t know if there is some sort of custom when it comes to </span>
  <em>
    <span>sharing secrets and memories to become close</span>
  </em>
  <span> so he just gives him an honest reply.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They told me that when people want to know each other better, they talk about personal topics while eating snacks.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Linhardt’s expression is hard to understand. He looks surprised, confused and maybe even amused at the same time— honestly, Byleth is still amazed at how people seem to be able to show so much. Yet Linhardt moves so that Byleth can enter his room, even if there are so many books on the floor that Byleth is not sure about </span>
  <em>
    <span>where</span>
  </em>
  <span> to put his feet to walk without stepping on one of them. Fortunately he manages, somehow, especially after he puts the plate with the sweet buns on Linhardt’s desk. They both stay quiet for a bit before Linhardt takes a bite of one of the buns and points at the single chair in the room; so Byleth sits, facing towards the bed when Linhardt reaches it in a few steps.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So,” Linhardt begins and Byleth really wants to know if him being there is okay with the other, but the expression Linhardt has doesn’t help him “you want to know me better. What did they told you? What should we talk about?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It sounds like he wants to humor Byleth, at least, but Byleth himself never thought much about how to start— in fact he was sure Linhardt, knowing how to manage this kind of situation better than him, would help. Apparently it’s on Byleth though, some sort of </span>
  <em>
    <span>take responsibility</span>
  </em>
  <span> for doing this. He clears his throat while taking one of the buns, looking at them as if they hold all the answers. They don’t.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Annette told me friends share secrets and memories.” he explains carefully, eyes on Linhardt for a few seconds, “I think secrets might be a bit too much, because we still don’t know each other very well. Maybe.” does it sound rude? How much should ‘very well’ be to be considered enough? This is starting to give Byleth a headache, but since Linhardt doesn’t speak, he supposes the younger one is still listening to him. “So, memories?” he offers.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Linhardt looks delighted while chewing the bun, at least.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I can imagine Annette giving you this advice, Professor.” that’s his first sentence, matching with an expression that makes it sound like </span>
  <em>
    <span>not that I can see where she’s coming from but really?</span>
  </em>
  <span>, which doesn’t help Byleth much. Yet, Linhardt’s eyes have something really similar to what Byleth notices when the other is particularly interested. “But, I have to admit it, getting to know your secrets sounds good, Professor.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The curve of his lips makes Byleth wonder if he should have chosen another way of getting close. Not that he has many secrets— well, if he doesn’t consider the whole matter with Sothis, and the Creation Sword, and a couple of other things. Details, really.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“One secret or memory for one of yours, then.” Linhardt offers and to be honest, it sounds fair and also how it should be, considered Annette’s advice. Some equivalent exchange Byleth is okay with. It’s not like he has something he wants to hide and he supposes that the chance of Linhardt asking him about the Goddess specifically is very low. So he nods and Linhardt makes a gesture as if inviting him to go first while he finishes his sweet bun.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mh.” it’s the only sound Byleth makes, because he thought the other would ask a question and this is harder if it’s him the one who gets to choose what to share. Probably, after a very long pause, Linhardt gets what the problem is. “What’s your oldest memory, Professor?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Byleth blinks and focuses on recalling it. For sure, it’s something he shared with Father. The first battle… no, the first time he saw a market— no, the sword. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“When my father taught me about the sword.” he replies and looks at Linhardt. After a few moments, even Byleth gets that he should probably make an effort to not just… reply but </span>
  <em>
    <span>tell</span>
  </em>
  <span>. “I was…” how old was he? “seven or eight. Nine, maybe. I don’t remember well.” he offers as an apology for not being accurate about it. A spark of curiosity in Linhardt’s eyes tells him that maybe this is not a boring topic as he thinks it is. “But it was a wooden sword good for an adult, so it was very heavy. Father told me that, with him being a mercenary and leading such a life, we had no time to get accustomed to child swords first. It took me a lot of time to manage.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And weren’t you powerless during the time you couldn’t handle a sword?” “I never joined a fight back then,” he admits “Father trained me, but the first time on a battlefield was years later. I had daggers as self-defense weapons.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Linhardt frowns a bit, probably unable to understand why such a young child should be able to use </span>
  <em>
    <span>daggers</span>
  </em>
  <span> instead of reading fairytales. Byleth feels like he’s trying to be considerate by not asking him about it; Linhardt just nods, in fact, as if trying to accept it as it comes. Byleth’s turn - and many turns after that - ends up being just him turning the question to the other and it doesn’t take long before he hears him say “My mother humming a lullaby.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It surprises him. Of course Linhardt, like every other student, has or has had a mother in his life. But he just never thought it could come out like this, as a topic between them, probably because none of the mercenaries he grew up with ever told stories about it and if they did, it was nothing more than a brief mention, a bittersweet memory nobody wanted to speak of in details. Byleth understood that most of their families were not alive anymore and that was the reason why nobody asked about them. It was like a tacit agreement.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Did she have a beautiful voice?” he is not sure if this is the right thing to say, but he’s trying his best. Linhardt doesn’t seem to mind— he smiles affectionately, even. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It suits him</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Byleth thinks, way more than battles and war could ever do. This suits Linhardt the same way taking care of others does with Ashe or singing does with Dorothea. It’s a weird thought Byleth pushes in the back of his mind, for now. “She did.” Linhardt replies before going on with his second question: “Were you a crybaby when you were younger, Professor? I can’t imagine it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Byleth doesn’t have to think much, this time. He shakes his head briefly as he says “I never cried.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Linhardt’s reaction is to be expected: surprised first, curious immediately after. Despite the fact that it could sound tactless, Byleth is not annoyed when he’s asked “Really? Never?” but stays quiet anyway, because it’s hard to explain. Especially when it’s something unusual for those listening to him; not that many people are interested in that aspect of his life. In fact, he thinks this is the first time someone even asked that much. Maybe Linhardt wants to be closer too, after all.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Never.” Byleth replies, his eyes on the still unfinished sweet bun in his hands “I think… feelings are complicated.” he can’t help but admit it, searching for Linhardt and trying to study his expression to see if the revelation is too much. But Linhardt is listening to him, intently and without interrupting him. “Father said that even when it hurt when I fell, I didn’t cry. And when I was enthusiastic about something, it was hard to understand because I didn’t smile or laugh. I think… I probably </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> when people are supposed to feel something and show it. I just…” he stops, unsure about the words he should use to describe this. Byleth still feels Linhardt’s eyes on him and it doesn’t make him uncomfortable, but it still makes him feel as if he’s a very strange subject talking about something unreal.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Unless Linhardt’s voice reaches him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You just don’t know when to feel the same.” Byleth looks at him and he doesn’t know if the surprise he </span>
  <em>
    <span>feels</span>
  </em>
  <span> can be actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>seen</span>
  </em>
  <span> on his face, but this is the first time someone really seems to understand. He nods and, somehow, the knot he had in his stomach until now loosens and he can finally finish his bun.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They go on for a while. Byleth, after his reply on emotions, asks Linhardt why he chose magic instead of bow— he doesn’t mention the sword or the axe because he supposes an attack with those weapons would imply a certain proximity, which is not the best if you don’t stand blood. In fact, Linhardt explains a lot of things about his preference for magic. Byleth is not sure he understands everything completely, but pays attention. Then, Linhardt asks him about his first battle, since Byleth mentioned that it wasn’t until a certain age— he tells him that the first battle he remembers is from many years ago, when he was only around thirteen or something like that. Linhardt looks conflicted, probably thinking that a thirteen years old boy shouldn’t fight but learn or laze around instead of killing people. Yet he doesn’t say anything, so Byleth doesn’t tell him that he thinks Father probably would have gladly avoided it for a couple of years more if he could. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Byleth doesn’t want to ask Linhardt anything related to fights, so the next question is what his first magic was, because maybe it was something safe in a room of his house. Apparently it was or, at least, it wasn’t anything too dramatic. The very first magic - wind, something that Byleth suddenly thinks it suits Linhardt much more than fire or thunder but still less than healing - was in the garden and it felt extremely natural. It sounds like a very simple yet happy memory to him and Linhardt even smiles, so Byleth feels that it’s okay.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They share so many memories that Byleth doesn’t even notice the sun going down little by little. It could also be because, when Linhardt asks him about his favorite thing and Byleth replies “Cats” without even letting him finish his question, Linhardt chuckles— it’s a very light and quiet sound, but it’s so… Byleth doesn’t know how to describe it, but it makes him feel happy. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Oh</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he thinks at some point while Linhardt says something about Byleth and his love for cats, </span>
  <em>
    <span>maybe it is a bit like the sun</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And that’s when he notices that the sky, outside of the window, is getting darker and darker.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Linhardt looks out of the window and then back to him “Well, Professor, it’s almost time to join the others in the dining hall.” he declares, but still doesn’t stand up so Byleth waits, not knowing if they are actually going together or if it was a polite way to tell him to leave the room. “But first, since you mentioned both secrets and memories, I wouldn’t mind you sharing a secret too.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Byleth blinks. A secret? He could tell him about Sothis, but it would be a very long explanation— one that Byleth still isn’t ready nor able to give, anyway. He could tell Linhardt about… “I don’t really have secrets…?” he admits, because it’s not like he can </span>
  <em>
    <span>make up one</span>
  </em>
  <span> just to satisfy the other. Will this ruin the whole ‘getting closer’ session? He should have asked Annette for more details.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mmmh,” Linhardt doesn’t look pissed. Amused, yes. Byleth sees him standing up, finally, and then he reaches the door as if implying that they are going to go out together after all “Should I tell you something so that we will share a secret then, Professor?” Linhardt suggests and Byleth feels an itch on his neck, as if something is actually stinging at him and yet he knows there’s nothing there against his skin. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Byleth moves, step by step, until he’s in front of Linhardt— his lips are curved in a small (</span>
  <em>
    <span>tempting?</span>
  </em>
  <span>) smile. He bents slightly, just to whisper something into his ear.</span>
</p>
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